


PHILOPHOBIA-TRAUMATIC FROM THE PAST

by orphan_account



Category: Hit the Floor (TV), Jude KinkadexZero
Genre: #Deja Vu, #Philophobia, #Trauma, #diary, Drama & Romance, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:13:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28025301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Jude was born in a rich family and he is the only child. His mother passed away when she gave birth because of rare immune disease. So, he lives with his father and his father,Oscar takes care of him very well. But Oscar has a company which earns lots of money. And this is the reason why Jude's life become hell. His uncle(his father's elder brother) is jealous of Jude's family.So,he hired some men to kidnap Jude.Luckily,Jude escaped from them and returned his house.But when Jude returned, his father,Oscar had a car accident and passed away.And it makes a long-term pain in Jude's heart. But he was brought up by his mother's sister and he dreams of becoming a lawyer.What will happen when he attends in Colombia University and he meets Zero- a bad boy and a popular basketball player in basketball club. Let's explore Jude's love life through this story.
Relationships: Jude Kinkade/Zero | Gideon
Comments: 3
Kudos: 14





	1. Jude's childhood

**Author's Note:**

> First,I want to give warm welcome to all readers. I want you guys will read and rate my 1st story with significant mark. I wanna reveal this fact: This story was inspired by my nightmare :)).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jude's journey became his nightmare when he was kidnapped by mafia.On this time, he also met Gideon(young Zero) and Laura( Zero's sister. Will they escape themselves or they will be rescued? Read this chapter.

**Jude's POV:**

I'm Jude Kinkade, the only child of Oscar Kinkade, a famous businessman. My dad is a typical man,who is very caring to his wife and his son. About my mom, she passed away when I was just born. It was retold by my aunt and even though I never met my mom, I have to say that she is one of the best mothers in the world. Returning to my story, I was a good student with flying colors, and my dad is so proud of me. My dad has a big company in LA and he wants to me to obtain his position after he retired. I talk to my dad that I want to become lawyer. My uncle, Johnson, is always jealous of my dad only because of my grandfather's decision. So, he wanted to kill me, the to my dad and he would take the company from my dad's hands. How greedy he is!

**Flashback(11 years ago):**

_One day, about 11 years ago,it had become one of the most unforgettable in my life. He came to my house and he invited my dad and I to travel to Rockies for summer holiday.previous night, he called to my dad: " Oscar, my lovely bro. I want to invite you and my nephew to go hiking in Rockies. Do you want to join?"_

_"Yes, my big bro. You are my only person I can believe", my dad responded. My dad came across my bedroom and he called me "Jude, do you wake up? I have an important thing to talk with you,hon. Your uncle want us to have a journey in Rockies,do you like it?". I smiled broadly when I just heard about the trip because my dad promised that he would gave me a surprise for my good results. And I immediately answered" Of course, daddy. I always wanted to come there. How amazing it is!". He smiled and said:'Ok my puppy,sleep well and wake up at 6 am tomorrow,yeah? Good night,Juddie". I can't help but feel funny when he called my nickname. He kissed me on my forehead and he came back his room. I was too excited, but I said myself that I need to sleep early._

_"Wake up, Jude or you will lose your chance to visit", my dad called me and tickled my cheeks. I heard that and got out of my bed. I came to bathroom and did morning hygiene. After that, my dad cooked pancakes for me and him, while I packed my clothes. After eating pancakes, my dad and I was sitting on the sofa. My uncle came to my house at 7 am to pick up us. And START THE TRIP RIGHT NOW!_

_We drove to Rockies and we chatted lots of stuffs, from my study results to attractions, foods,...of our destination. When we came, we started finding out somewhere to build a tent near the lake. We took a tent, then my dad went to the forest to find woods, while my uncle went around to buy stuffs. I was alone by the lake when a boy approached me and greeted me.He had blonde hair with brown eyes and wide smile. We talked a while when a girl, I guess she is his sister because of their resemblance.He said good bye and he disappeared. He is so cute boy! OMG! I forgot to ask his name. Regret it!_

_After about an hour later, my dad and my uncle came back with lots of stuff. We started cooking and we had a meal. In the afternoon,we went on hiking and climbing, it's so funny and full of laughter. It was normal until when did I go to the forests. I wanted to ask my dad, but he was asleep,so I couldn't wake him up. My Uncle said that I could go anywhere, he would talk to my dad later. He even promised that he would pick me up before 4 pm. I only wanted to wander around the woods because of my curiosity(it's normal for a 7-year-old boy). I was looking around when I saw a ball near the bushes. I came closer and closer, and took the ball on my hands. While scrutinizing the ball, I felt something strange behind my back. My guts said that I need to run AFAP, but I chose not to hear it. , After a while, I was gagged by a napkin which has a disgusting and nauseous smell. I felt dizzy and everything around became black._

_I couldn't remember anything,I only knew that when I woke up, I was on a car,my hands and legs tied by ropes. I looked into the window, but the surrounding is very strange. I felt something bad. I saw a man driving the car. "Hey, bastard. What are you doing to me?", I yelled. His eyes was very dangerous and piercing through the rear view mirror, it made me startle and get goosebumps. I called out my dad and my uncle, but it was only waste of energy._

_After a while, the man finally said "You can't do anything, boy. If you don't shut up your mouth now, I will kill you". His threat made me more scared and trembling. After 2 hours,I guess, we came to the destination. It was a small building in the remote area, surrounded by bushes and pines.He called out a person called James:_

_"James, help me to take this boy to the room upstairs". The man James answered: "Boss, we have taken another boy and a girl in this room. Is it possible?". "It's ok, don't worry, man",this man said._

_After that, James took me to the room. I was so surprised when I looked 2 familiar faces. I tried to remember,"Oh, It's 2 kids I saw by the lake yesterday. Why are they here now", I told myself. When I came closer, I saw 2 kids sleeping calmly on the bed. I didn't want to bother them,so I slept on the sofa._

_It was 6 pm when I woke up.I heard someone call me. I opened my eyes and saw this boy standing by the sofa. He smiled broadly and said " Hey, buddy.What's your name? Why are you here?". " Jude, and you?"_

_"I'm Gideon, it's Laura,my sister. We were taken by a strange man, and we were taken here. What about you?"_

_"I do too", I responded. After that, I saw a woman open the door and took 3 boxes on her hand. She said with cold tone "It's your dinner, kid. Eat quickly and sleep early. Don't dare to escape". Then, she left the room. We opened the boxes, it is lasagna,my favorite food. We started eating and chatted. Gideon said that he is an orphan because his parents were dead in an accident. And I also told my own story. They are very funny and friendly. After chatting, it was 9pm, so we slept on the bed. We don't know what will happen tomorrow._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S THE 1ST CHAPTER, GUYS. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT? READ NEXT CHAPTERS TO FIND OUT. LOVE YOU GUYS❤💕💕!


	2. Escaping and seperating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jude, Gideon and Laura found the way to escape the building after they heard a phone conversation. It's about that 3 kids would be sold to a human trafficking organization. They escaped sneakily at night, but they were still stalked by James. They hid in the bushes and waited until James left. They discuss with each other to seperate, each would find different directions. Gideon wanted to accompany Laura with him, but it's very dangerous. So he gave her his necklace and gave Jude his lucky marble. They promised to meet each other in some day.

**Jude's POV:**

_We woke up in the next morning.We did the morning hygiene and the same woman gave them breakfast: 3 loafs of bread and a bottle of milk. We ate happily and chatted about our hobbies. I found out that Gideon likes sports, while Laura loves drawing. She even carried papers and pencils in her bag. Gideon was 10 years old, while Laura was the same age as mine. She took a pencil and a paper and started drawing me. I have to say that she is too talented, more gifted than other kids at her same age. My portrait is so resemble to me! She said: "Jude, it's my first present to you. Take this and keep it carefully". I looked at the picture on my hands with awe.I thanked her._

_After a while, a man came to our room and told " Let's go out the room for cleaner tidy the room and make the bed.Go to the living room, the boss wants to meet you,kids". We screamed in happiness because finally, we could get out of the room.We headed to the living room and saw a man wearing black suit was sitting on the armchair and drinking coffee. He signaled us to sit down on 3 small chairs. He started:" Hey! I know you guys were scared at first when I took you here.But now, I want you to say sorry to you." He said and his eyes were wet with tears willing to drop. We sat silently and continued listening. " I'm too alone in this building. My wife left me with our children and I never met them again. So I only wanted to adopt someone.I couldn't because I am a mafia boss!"_

* * *

_"So when I saw you, I only wanted to keep you near me. I couldn't do anything, so I have to do this. I'm so sorry for that." I came near to him and said "You are very kind and good man. I think that you will find someone as your child. Laura did,too; but Gideon didn't. I saw something suspicious in his eyes. He stood up and went to the kitchen. He took a bottle of water and drank. I don't know why he did like this._

_After an hour, we came back our room. I couldn't help but ask Gideon " Why are you indifferent to this man? He is suffering a lot". " I saw something strange in his eyes when I glared at his eyes. Something shrewd, I couldn't describe. I feel something bad when he said these things. It's not true, Jude". Laura only sat on the bed and she shrugged.I went to the bed and chatted with Laura instead.Gideon is a bit crazy.We chitchatted when we heard someone yelling. We came to the door and overheard. The same voice I heard an hour ago.We opened the door slightly and saw him talking in the phone. It's like this:_

_Mr. Black suit: I said that I had 3 lovely and innocent kids.I'm sure that we can earn lots of money from this deal._

_Other speaker: Ok, but you have to be careful. If Mr. "BLACK TIGER" found out your any mistakes, prepare to be beheaded._

_Mr. Black suit: Don't worry. We will be rich after this deal. Only sell them for human traffickers and collect money. I ensure that our big boss will never be disappointed with me._

_Other speaker: Ok, so meet at 10pm in the same location in next 2 days.See ya later._

_The black suit man hung up the phone and turned around. It's lucky because we closed the door quickly, or we would be dangerous. We started arguing about these things we heard. Gideon said "No. We need to escape this night.Or they never meet our relatives". I felt so scared but still tried to listen eagerly Gideon asked Laura to take pencil and paper and they went out. I couldn't imagine that they are too smart and clever. Thanks to Gideon's good memory and Laura's drawing, we could see the exits on the map Laura sketched. First is the door in bathroom, next is the garage and the last is main entrance. We planned that we would tried to get out by the 3rd idea, but the security was very tight.So we only have 2 choices. We divided into 2 groups. I would escape by the bathroom door because it's near the garage and nobody cared about it. Gideon and Laura chose the garage direction. We planned to escape at 11pm. Gideon hid his backpack on the closet, so nobody could find it. He took out and gave me a rope.He also had a small knife and a small torch._

_It was exactly 11pm. Gideon gave me a rope and I tied it on the window bar carefully.I held the rope and climbed, then I asked Laura to cut the rope for me.I sneakily went to the garage and after a short time, I saw Gideon and Laura outside the garage. How fast they were! We tried to run as fast as possible, but Laura accidentally kicked on a tin can; and it sounded a bit loudly. We had to run faster because we heard someone called us " Hey kids, stop right now. Fuck!". We ignored this voice and went on running, but we heard the footsteps approaching us. Gideon pulled me and Laura in a bush and hid them. After a while, we started mumbling and whispering. " Hey, it's very dangerous now,so we need to separate. Each of us will find different directions", Gideon said. Laura's eyes were moist and she wanted to cry, but she knew that she couldn't. Gideon held her small hands and cooed: "My sweetheart, my lovely little sister. We have to separate now. I don't want, but it's the last choice. As you know, we are stalked by mafia. I promise that I will find you soon". He said and gave her his bracelet " It's my bracelet. Let's take this plz.If we have chance to meet again, I can recognise you. Don't forget me, darling". Gideon cried softly and hugged his sister tightly.After that, he turned to my direction and said, " Hey Jude. I know that we only knew recently, but I feel that we are very close.Plz take this lucky marble in case we can meet some day." Then, he pecked my cheek. I can't imagine he was too mature although he was 10 years old. We led each other to the main road and found the other directions._

**THANKS FOR YOUR PREFERENCES AND KUDOS! PLEASE READ AND COMMENT EAGERLY AND FRANKLY. I'M OPEN TO YOUR COMMENTS, BUT PLZ DON'T CRITICISE ME. IT'S THE FIRST TIME I WROTE STORIES, SO THERE CAN BE MISTAKES.LET'S GO ON EXPLORING JUDE'S LIFE, OK? 💔💕♐♐**

**FACTS: I JUST TURN TO 19 YEARS OLD IN LAST 5 DAYS.I'MA SAGITTARIUS GUY.♐👌**


	3. Returning home and father's sudden death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After escaping and separating, Jude found a woman and she helped him to return home. Jude called to his dad and asked him to pick him up. But a shocking event happened: Oscar died after a car accident. Jude was broken, but Clara was beside him and grieved with him.

**Jude's POV**

_I saw a woman in the far, so I came near to her. It turned out that she's a janitor. She looked at me with warm welcoming eyes " Hey boy. Come here.Where do you live. Why did you wander here at midnight", she asked me.Then, I explained all things to her, and she suddenly hugged me " Oh Jude, don't worry. I will take you to the bus station tomorrow. Now, come to my flat and sleep. I only live alone." She sounded like a kind person, so I agreed. She took me to her small flat and gave me a glass of water and lead me to the bed. She hugged me tightly and cuddled my hair and my cheek. She told lots of stories about her and I was listening and we laughed a lot. After that, she sang a lullaby and I slept very well. She hugged me tightly,and I felt like my mom was here._

**Oscar's POV:**

I even don't know what happened to my Jude. Two days ago, we had a picnic with his uncle and we had done lots of things together. In lunch, my brother gave me a can of soda,and I happily drank it. I didn't know why, but after drinking, I felt dizzy.In the late afternoon, my brother yelled and called my name with cracked voice : " Oscar, my poor little brother, Jude was lost.I tried to find him but I couldn't. I don't know where he was". He cried loudly and embraced me. My face was pale after this shocking news, I asked him: " No, are you kidding me? Jude is good boy, he never goes anywhere without my permission. How can it happen?". I returned to Los Angeles and asked police to help me find him. They tried to investigate and stick announcement around LA, but there wasn't any information. I cried very much at night, and I was afraid that he was in danger. I held his silver bracelet that my wife gave to me. She said" Oscar, I feel weaker. I want to give it to Jude, our son. Let's wear it and give my love to him". She smiled brightly and closed her eyes, forever. I couldn't forget her after 7 years, but I tried to give Jude everything he wanted. I never forced him to study hard or get high results. But he is a smart and well behaved boy. I always feel proud of him.But now, he isn't here.We went to the woods and found the bracelet on the ground.i held it on my hand and kept it near me.I was thinking about him when the picture of Jude and me was shattered on the floor.I don't know why, but my side was broken entirely.I start feeling very anxious.

**Jude's POV:**

_In the next morning, after waking up, I went to the kitchen because of the scent of foods flooding in my nostrils. I saw Mrs. Clara( the woman saved me yesterday) making omelette and placed some slices of bread on the kitchen table. I greeted:"Good morning,Mrs. Clara. How are you?"_

_"I'm good Jude. Are you hungry? I'm cooking.Sit on the table. Breakfast is almost ready", she answered.I sat on the chair and waited.When I was eating, Clara asked me " Jude,where do you live?". "I live in Los Angeles with my father. I miss him so much",I pouted. " Don't worry, I will help you to find your family. There is a store near here, we can borrow them cell phone. Do you remember your Dad's number?"._

_" Yes, of course". -"You are too smart,Jude"._

_After breakfast, she took me to the store and she borrowed cell phone. I dialled to my Dad, after 2 rings, I heard my dad in other direction:_   
_-Hello.Who is speaking?_

_-Daddy, I'm Jude. Are you still good?_

_-Jude, my son. Where are you now? What happened? I miss you so much._

_I heard my dad sobbing, then I gave the phone to Mrs. Clara:_   
_-Hello Sir. I'm Clara.I saw your son on the street, so I took him to my house. We are in XXX town,I want to meet you._

_-Yeah. I'm Oscar. Thanks for your kindness, Mrs. Clara. I will drive to your place now. Can you take him to the bus station. I will pick up both of you. I want you to become Jude's nanny. Is it OK?_

_-OK. I will consider.I will take him after 30 mins. See you soon, Mr. Oscar._

_-I will see you soon, Jude. My dad said and hang up the phone._

_After the call, Clara took me to the bus station. I was excited to come back home. Clara was sitting near me the whole hours but we didn't see my dad. So, Clara decided to take me to my home. She caught a cab and we went to my house We were on the cab when it stopped suddenly . We saw some police blocked the road. The taxi driver and we took off to ask them. When I took off the cab and a police approached:_

_"Hey kid, don't come here. It's dangerous"_

_"What happened,sir?"- Clara asked him._

_"There was an accident here. A car was fallen under the mountain and we are trying to find the victim"_

_I came closer, and I saw the familiar car. It looked like my dad's.I was wondering when another police said "Hey,our team just found a wallet. It is written as 'Oscar Kinkade, DOB: 12/04/1984,in LA' "_

_I couldn't believe in my ears, and I screamed : No, you are lying. You are bad, I don't believe you, no!". I collapsed and cried loudly. Clara came behind me and embraced me tightly and patted my back " Jude,my poor son. I can't imagine what happened. How can God be unfair to you. You are orphan now! How unfair!". She said with cracked voice and she also cried. After a while, they found my dad's corpse and they took it to the cemetery.I took my silver bracelet and placed it in my heart._

Oscar's POV:

I was so happy when I heard my son's voice. I immediately drove to the destination. I took on my car and sped up as fast as possible.When I drove near to the cliff, I wanted to slow down, so I used my brake.Unfortunately, it didn't work and I couldn't do anything. I was panicked and then my car crashed and fell down the cliff. I don't know why the brake couldn't work at that time.I closed my eyes and I saw my wife holding my hands and we flew upon the sky.


	4. Funeral and secrets revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Oscar's death, Jude became silent and reserved. He didn't make friends with anyone, except Clara and his aunt. They applied a petition for Jude custody to the court and it was approved. Before moving to new home, Jude accidentally overheard a phone call between his uncle and another person. He found out all the secrets and he promised himself to revenge and he would become a lawyer in the future.  
> On the other hand, Gideon was sent to a boarding school because he saved a girl who fell off the deep lake. And then, he changed his name into Zero. He was good at sports and very popular at school. It's why he was hated and envious by peers.He didn't care, and he didn't have any friends.

**Jude's POV:**

_I was still shocked after my father's death.I cried in pain every night, but, thanks to Mrs. Clara and my aunt, I recovered quickly. We had celebrated a funeral and then my dad's corpse had been taken to the cemetery. But there was a serious problem:my custody. The court acquired the custodian to have fulfilling family. My aunt and Clara gave them a petition and it took 2 weeks to approve. My uncle also gave another one to the court and said that he was rich enough to bring me upin 11 years.But the court was consistent and decisive. So, my aunt won and she wanted me to move to her house.One day, she came across my house and met my uncle. My aunt said to my uncle:" Mr. Kinkade, I want Jude to move into my house. What do you think?"_

_My uncle responded : "No. He is my only nephew.I just lost my younger brother, I couldn't lose my nephew. Get out of here! I will never agree". My aunt was angry because of his behavior and they argued fiercely. After a while, my aunt left after whispering: "We will live together soon, my poor son". She kissed my cheek and waved. My uncle halted in the same place and his eyes was full of hatred. He stomped in guest bedroom. Only me and Clara were in the kitchen. Everything was normal until when I overheard a phone conversation between my uncle and and another person. he said: Ok. I will transfer money to you. But you only receive two-third of the total,because you couldn't kill Jude. He is still alive and now I can't take him to my side. About Oscar's death, you did very well. His car fell from the cliff and he died. He really died. I will take all from his hands".He laughed with an evil tone.So, I decided to call to my aunt and asked her to pick me up. I couldn't live with my cruel uncle. He was the culprit of my father's death. The hatred feeling was pooling in my chest and willing to burst. I still remember all things he said, and I promise that I would revenge him._

_I suddenly missed my Dad. When he was still alive, he used to ask me: " What do you want in the future, my darling?", and I said" I want to be a lawyer. I want to protect innocent people". And I promised it to my Daddy's soul. After an hour, my aunt came to pick me up. I packed my clothes, picture of me and my dad, and my mother's picture in my dad's night-stand. I looked at my house the last time and I waved to it, to my childhood.I asked Clara to go with me, and of course, she agreed. We live in a big mansion in a town, which is 200 km far from my old house. And then, my uncle and my aunt enrolled me to primary school.I got excellent results. When I turn to 18, I take SAT exam and I get 1560/1600.After that, I receive a letter of confirmation of Colombia University . I enroll Law faculty and I'm very happy._

**_(END OF FLASHBACK)_ **

**Gideon's( Zero) POV:**

I'm Gideon, an orphan and I live with my younger sister, Laura. Our parents passed away because of car accident. We lived in an orphanage with many kids. One day, the organization held a picnic in Rockies and we were very excited. Laura and I prepared many things such as ropes, torch and small knife,because we had been taught by our dad. He said:" You two need bring all of them in case the urgent situation happens". I went to the lake, and we saw a boy playing near here. I approached and greeted him. We talked in a while, and Laura called me out. I left him, but I forgot to ask his name. How stupid!

We were on the way to the camp when a man approached me. It was quite dark and we couldn't see who he was. He came closer and asked us the way to the gasoline station. We took him to the destination and he thanked us.He gave us 2 chocolate bars. We didn't think too much and ate them. And then, we felt dizzy and the last thing I knew is: my sister and I was on a car, and it led us to a building in the middle of the forest. Thanks to my past experience,we weren't scared and tried to escape.We always tried to go around when nobody knew.And we found a garage behind the building. It wasn't looked out by anyone, and we even found that there was a pathway leading to main road by binocular.

We was asleep after long journey around the house. We didn't know anything until we woke up. We saw a kid sleeping on the couch. We called him out and he opened his eyes. I recognized that he was the same boy I me the previous day near the lake. We chatted about family, hobbies and stuffs. Next morning, we were called to meet a man that we called Mr. Black Suit. He told his life story, but I saw something unreal and dishonest in his eyes. So I warned against Jude and Laura, but they didn't care. After hearing phone call between that man and someone else, we tried to escape asap. We planned and did it on this night. But we were detected by them, so we had to separated.Before that, I gave my stuffs to Jude and Laura, in case I would meet them later.

I was wandering around when I saw a crowd of people gathered by the lake. I came closer and saw a girl drowned on the lake. It was quite deep, but I ventured to save her. Her parents wanted to thank me, so they offered that they would send me to a prestigious boarding school. I was so good at sports, and I was popular. I joined in football and basketball club in high school and I achieved some awards, rings and medals. Some girls tried to flirt me and I started being a bad boy who liked locking down girls and even boys. It was only one night stand stuff, because I didn't like relationships ( I lost my virginity when I was 16). I may be a bad boy, but my academic performance is very good. I take 1450/1600 in SAT, and I'm in the top 10. I enroll in Colombia University for Economics.


	5. First meeting- deja vu- WHO ARE YOU?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After 12 years, Jude is 18 now, and he studies Medicine in Colombia University.He meets many people, and he has 2 best friends in high school: Jane Steward and Thomas Wilson.They study Economics. They often talk about a guy in basketball club- Zero. What happens when Jude lives in the dorm and Zero is his roommate?

**Jude's POV:**  
This is my first day in the university and I'm excited now. Now, I'm waiting Jane Steward and Thomas Wilson- my best friends from high school. We enroll in the same university, but they learn Economics while I do Law.Jane's nickname is " talkative Blondie", while Thomas's is" cold-hearted rich boy". They give me a weird nickname "reserved gentleman" because I'm silent and reserved. I'm shy when they talk about love and sex.

We are at the entrance of university. Its gate has parabolic shape, how amazing! We head to the Management Department to take schedule and textbooks.Looking at my timetable, I have to learn 5 other courses in this semester,including Math. We are walking on the playground when I see a familiar face. he is holding a ball and kissing a girl.I only got my right senses when Jane pats my arm: "Hey, Jude babe! Why are you looking at this guy intensely? Do you have feeling to him?". She and Thomas giggle to me. "No, I don't. I'm not gay.You two moron!". I look at my timetable and realize that my first lesson is Pure Math. I go to math class and start learning. Because of the first lesson, we don't have any assignment, apart from a trial test.

The next, I meet Jane and Thomas at the same place. They are talking very happily about anything else when I pat Thomas's shoulder."Hey, buddy. How is your first lesson?". "Good until I hear this news. We need to enroll on the dorm before next week. It's very bad when we can't decide our roommate. The dorm manager did". We go to the announcement board to see our roommates. I find my name and I see that I will live with a guy called Zero. I wonder, who he is.I also see that he is in Mathematics class, so I ask Jane: " Hey Jane. Do you know the Zero guy?". She looks at me with a shocked face and answers

-" Oh my god. The hottie in basketball club. You live with him?" - "Yeah"

-Jane. Do you know that he is a bad guy? A notorious boy who only prefers one night stand. He doesn't like serious relationship. Stop daydreaming, my girl!

I don't understand what they are saying. I go to the reception table instead.She saw me and she starts:

-Hello, sir. How can I help you?

-I want to ask about my dorm. Where is it?

-Your name is...

-Jude Kinkade, madame.

-OK. Your dorm is on the 3 floor, room 305, with Zero.

-Can I change the other room? I want to live with my friend.

-No. I'm afraid that we can't change because the list is full now.

-OK.

I, Jane and Thomas take a cab to our house. We will pack our stuffs and be ready to move to the dorm. At dinner, my uncle asks me about my first day at uni. We chat and laugh, then I ask my uncle:

-Uncle, aunt! I want to live in dorm. Do you two have any idea?

-No,Jude. Your aunt and I always approve you. You should open your relationship circle. It will be better.

-But I don't want to separate from you.I get used to living with you two -I pout my lips childishly.

-Jude, you can come back home on holidays.Don't be childish and stubborn anymore, honey.We will find way to visit you. -My uncle pats my shoulder slightly.

-Yeah, Jude. I also want you to live in the dorm to make more friends. You should know how to love. How can you be still a virgin guy at this age?, my aunt asks and chuckles.

-Auntie. I only want to focus on learning.You make me feel embarrassed now. 

-We will take you to the dorm on Saturday.You start living on Monday.

I go to my bedroom and I take a shower. After that, I open my cover and take my phone. A stranger gave me friend request, and I click on this notification. It's Zero, my so-called roommate. I message to him:

-Me: Hey bro. Nice to meet you.

-Zero: Yeah. Juddie!

-Me: Wait what? Why do you know my nickname?

-Zero:Oh boy. I like calling like this. I'm not a stalker🙃.......

-Zero: It's late now. Sleep well. Talk later,Jude babe.

I still wonder if I have met the guy this morning. His face is very familiar, looks like...Gideon. Fucking hell! he isn't here.I remember to his gift- a tusk. I take it and ask myself "WHO ARE YOU? ARE YOU GIDEON? I WANT TO SEE YOU"

I sleep after mumbling, but startle after 10 mins because of a bad nightmare. I saw my uncle kill my dad, then he ran after me with a knife full of blood. I even smell the metallic blood smell. Disgusting as hell! I go to bathroom and wash my face.After feeling calm, I come back my bed and sleep. It happens very regularly since I was 8. I still remember everything on that day- the day when my dad left me and lived happily, left me alone with this cruel world.

**Zero's POV:**

I'm holding a basketball on the playground when my friend,Kyle, nudges my elbow.I look at his way and see a guy standing and talking with 2 other people. I feel something familiar in his smile and his facial expression,but I can't remember where I met him before.He suddenly reminds me of Jude,the boy I met 11 years ago. He has cute dimples, especially he smiles. I gave him my elephant tusk, hoping one day he will find me. But after 11 years, I still don't hear any information from him.I feel very disappointed and bored, so I stop hoping and finding his information.After Math lesson, Kyle meets me at the locker room. He starts:

"Zero buddy, I heard that you will have to move out of your old room. Freshmen has started learning, so manager arranges the room. Go to the announcement board to see. Maybe your roommate is a hot girl. Oh! My dirty mouth!"

"OK. I will see later.Let's go to the ball tonight. Hanging out with hot guys, man. Your dick is horny". I smirk to him and he confuses.🤣🤣. Yeah, Kyle is gay, but he is very proud of himself. I met him in high school and he is very friendly. he came out that he is gay when we were freshman.

I go to announcement board and see the name " Jude Kinkade" on the list near my name.I wonder: " WHO ARE YOU? ARE YOU JUDE?". But it can be another person with same name.I take my phone and go to Facebook. I type Jude Kinkade, and the face I wanted to see for 11 years appears. "So it's him.I will give him friend request", I mumble.After dinner, my phone has a notification "Jude Kinkade accepted your request".Immediately, he messages to me::

-Jude: Hey bro. Nice to meet you.

-Me: Yeah. Juddie!

-Jude: Wait what? Why do you know my nickname?

-Me:Oh boy. I like calling like this. I'm not a stalker🙃.

.... Me: It's late now. Sleep well. Talk later, babe.

I chuckle myself and sleep, waiting to meet him tomorrow.


	6. NEW ROOMMATE & WELCOMING PARTY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jude will move on the dorm in the first day and meets Zero.Jude will meet two other girls: Jenna and Rachel, and Kyle. Kyle wants to invite Jude to go out, but he has an excuse- welcoming party.Let's see what will happen in this chapter.

**Jude's POV:**

Today is the day I move on my new dorm. My uncle and my aunt take me to university with many packages. After unloading all the packages, I and my aunt talk a little bit. She says:

"Jude, I know that you won't get used to here in few next days, but you need more friends. The facilities are very well-qualified but you need to be careful,my little nephew!".

Tears are about to drop but she keeps to stop it. She embraces me tightly and then, my uncle also give me a bone-crushing hug. He gives me some pocket money.Then they drive away. I go to my new room and unpack my stuffs. I'm doing when I see two girls bursting into my room. A girl shouts:" Oh my god. A new hottie in our hall. Hey Jenna. Look at him!". I turn round and see a blond girl and a brunette one standing by the door. The blonde one comes to me and she gives her hand to me. I shake her hand and answer: Hey girls, my name is Jude, Jude Kinkade. And you?"

"Nice to meet you, Jude. I'm Rachel and she is Jenna. We are living in the next-door room. Do you know where is Zero? I'm finding him but I don't know where he is", Rachel introduces.

I start thinking how popular he is. I'm curious so I ask them: "Hey Rachel, how popular is he, I mean Zero?"

" Oh God, Jude. You don't know? He is the captain of our university's basketball team and he is a handsome guy. " But he is also very womanizer. He only prefers one night stand, after that, he kicks this poor girl. Asshole"- Jenna says and shrugs her shoulder.

" I hear someone talk backbite behind my back. Hey hot meat! You want me,huh?"- A guy raises his voice and smirks to Jenna.

"Huh? Are you kidding me? Hey, other girls can be easy, but I never do. I know when I close my legs, especially behind these horny guys like you. Shameless guy!"-Jenna replies with angry tone.

"Hey girl, you can't closing your legs permanently. One day, I will make you drop your pants and you have to beg me to do dirty things!", he whisper in her ears. She leaves out of the room and pulls Rachel away. After they leave, Zero approaches me and starts: " Hey new mate. I'm Zero,you must be Jude.Cutie!"- He is likely to flirt me.

-Yeah...I'm Jude...um, Rachel just asked about you. She wants to meet you.-I stutter. I don't know why.

-Ignore her. She is not my type. Jenna is the one I'm aiming at. She is very sexy,right?

-You ask me? Uh... yeah. She is pretty. But you make her embarrass.You should.... say sorry to her, I think.

-Hey Juddie. You don't know me, right? I.never.say.sorry.to.anybody.

He emphasizes each word in the sentence, which makes me tremble. He comes close to me, closer and closer until my back meets the wall. He puts his hands on the other sides and looks at my eyes:

"You won't know what I can do. Wait until tonight. I need to go to my class. See you soon." He draws back and he leaves me alone with a scary feeling. He must be 6'5''tall, while I'm only 6''. I decide to calm down and take my backpack. I must go to my French class before I'm late.

* * *

I rush out of my room and meet my two friends.Jane looks at my pale face and she pats my back: " Jude, what happened? You look bad. Anything matter to you?"

" Jane, you never know! I just met Zero and he made me scared."

"OK. Tell us details at lunch. Bye, Jude. We need to leave now. Meet you at canteen at 11 am."-Thomas says and drags Jane to the hallway and disappear. 

I look at my watch, it reads 8 a.m now. I'm about to be late. I run as fast as possible to the room. Suddenly, I bump into someone and my stuff scatter on the floor. I'm about to collect when he smiles and says: "Hey cute pie! Why do you have to be so rushy that you bump into me? But it's OK. I'm Kyle, what about you?". He gives a handshake to me and I answer: " Yes, I'm new here. I'm Jude-Jude Kinkade". He smirks and gives me a small note, his number. He leaves after turns around and winks at me.I wonder why I have issues with these guys. I think that 

The lesson is very good and exciting. Our lecturer has good accent and he asks us to be ready for a group project. Everything is good until when he calls out my name:

" Mr. Kinkade. You will team up with Zero.Where are you Zero?"

Zero stands up and winks to me. I look away and mumble myself "Fuck!". He moves and sits next to me. He shakes my hand and he smile slyly.I can feel something very bad in his smile.

After the bell rings, all students rush out of the room. I go to the main hall and wait my friends. Zero comes close and he starts:

"Hey Jude.We are the same team now.I'm sorry to my actions this morning. I only don't like your behavior."

I'm so surprised. I can't believe that the guy who never says sorry did it to me.I smile to him answer: "Don't worry. I don't care to trivialities. It's good when you know your mistakes. OK. I have to meet my friends in the canteen. Bye, Zero"

"Do you mind if I join with you guys? I want to have lunch with my roommate and my team member.Is it OK?"

I think a bit and I accept his offer. He hugs me and drags me to the canteen, not caring others glaring at us. 

When we go to the canteen,we meet Jane and Thomas and we have lunch together. Jane is very talkative, and she keeps asking Zero about his life. I think she wants to flirt him, but he doesn't care. I see Thomas feel a bit frustrated,until he sees Jenna from the distance. He yells: "Hey Jenna, hey Rachel. Come here. Eat with us!"

We look upwards and see two girls I met this morning. Thomas acts like a gentleman around Jenna, which makes Zero roll his eyes and mumble something.He is about to leave when Rachel speaks up: " Hey handsome Zero. I want to invite you and Jude to my dorm this evening for a welcoming party. We will start at 7 p.m,OK?"

Zero only nods slightly and leaves. We still chat until 12 p.m. I go to my room because I don't have any lessons this afternoon. I take my phone and call to Clara. I forget to inform to her. She went to New York last week and she must have come back. After 3 rings, Clara catches the phone and we have short talk.I remember that Kyle asked me to text to him,so I do:

-Me: Hey Kyle, I'm Jude here. Sorry for late message.

-Kyle: Hey Jude. Glad when you text to me.What are you doing tonight? I want to invite you to a cafe and chat.☺

-Me:Sorry Kyle. I will join in a party tonight in my hall. My friends celebrate to welcome me. 😅

-Kyle:OK. We can meet later.I don't want to ruin your moment.

-Me: Sorry for disappointing you. I will meet you in another day. Thanks for your invitation!See you soon, Kyle

-Kyle:OK,bye Jude!

I go to the wardrobe and find outfits for tonight. I decide to wear denim blue jeans and my T-shirt. It prints my childhood picture which Laura drew and gave to me, " Where are you two, Gideon and Laura? I wish I could meet you now.",I mumble myself. I think about them and don't know that Zero is here until he pats my shoulder. I startle and turn round.He chuckles and he asks me: " What are you thinking Jude, so deeply that you don't realize my presence.Oh, is this your childhood pic. You are cute, and still cute until now". He makes me blush a bit, but I choose to conceal it and respond: Yeah.It's a gift from a girl. The last we met was 11 years ago. I don't know where she is. I also miss his elder brother, Gideon. He is a smart and brilliant boy. I miss them so much". After that, I realize I blurt out my past to Zero. I don't know why. I take clothes and go to bathroom, leaving Zero alone.

**Zero's POV:**

I have met my roommate, Jude Kinkade. How naive and cute he is! His dimples are so impressive that I only want to touch it as much as possible. He was talking with 2 girls when I entered. I suddenly recognized Jenna, the girl I want the most. She is an attractive girl and her academic performances are too excellent. I flirted her a lot, but she only refused me. But in short time, I will make her open her legs and beg me to do dirty things😏. I tried to tease her,but she slapped as a response. She left the room after that. I saw Jude fidget his fingers, he seemed very embarrassed. And then, he greeted me with trembling tone. I smiled inside when he was affected by my presence. But the thing he said then pushed my button. He suggested apologizing Jenna, and I approached him to threaten because of his comment. It's the first time somebody said these bullshit to me. He is shorter than me 5 inches, so I looked a bit giant in front of him. I saw in his greenish hazel eyes deeply, and he looked fearful. So i decided to stay away and went to locker rooms. I met Kyle taking his clothes and he smiled himself. I wondered why he smiled so much, because he always looks cold-hearted and a bad boy. But now, he's just like a guy just meeting his long-term crush. I patted on his back, and he turned around. He said: " Oh my God ! Zero! I just met a cute guy, he is freshman of our university. I gave him my phone number and I would ask him out".I didn't understand what happened, so I asked "Kyle, calm down. You never did serious relationships before.". 

" I know, but I saw something naive in his eyes. Oh, i almost forgot. His name is Jude - Jude Kinkade. What about your roommate? Is he a good one? Your former one always complained about your lifestyle".

"Nothing to worry. Oh, Kyle, I will go to French class. See you in practice session".

I exited my locker and go to the main hall. I couldn't believe that Kyle falls in love with Jude. I know him, he is never serious, he only wanted to take naive guys on the bed, and then he would kick them when he was bored. Jude is too innocent and naive, I can't ignore this. I have to do something beforehand. I went to French class and my lecturer was in. I went to my seat and started listening to him. It's too boring, so I took a short nap. I startled when he called my name. I stood up and raised my hand. He said " Mr. Zero.You will team up with Mr. Kinkade for the project. Move your seat next to him, quickly". I was so surprised when Jude and I were partners.I went to his table and smiled to him. He seemed a bit confused and I took his hand to shake. He did again but not look in to my eyes. I said sorry to him and dragged him to canteen. I met 2 classmates and also Jude's friends : Jane and Thomas. We were chatting happily when Thomas saw Jenna. He invited her to join, and she accepted without any confusion. I felt a bit jealous when I saw them talking cheerily, so I was about to leave. However, Rachel invited me to the party, and even Jude. I was happy when I could prevent Jude from meeting Kyle. I went to the playground and played basketball. After an hour, I returned to my room, but I halted when I saw Jude taking a shirt on his hand. I looked carefully and I realized that it was Laura's picture. Yes, she drew him 11 years ago.It suddenly reminded to Laura, my little sister. I don't know where she was now and how she was. I only wanted to see her.I heard someone say that she was adopted by a rich family, but they moved to another country about 5 years ago.

_WHERE ARE YOU LAURA? I MISS YOU SO MUCH?_


	7. TRUTH OR DARE?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jude and Zero join in the party at Rachel's dorm room. We drink alcohol and play "truth or dare?".Let's see what happen to Jude?  
> SPOILER:  
> Rachel asks me then : Jude, what will you choose? Truth or dare?"
> 
> "Truth, I guess", I respond.
> 
> "OK. So, have you ever kissed anyone before?"
> 
> " Yeah...I kissed my uncle...my aunt...and.... Laura, my maid"
> 
> "No, it doesn't count, Jude. I want to ask if you had ever kissed any girls before. Don't say to me that you never kissed! You are still a virgin guy, Jude?"

**Jude's POV:**

After taking shower, Zero and I go to Rachel's dorm room. We can hear music loudly from the dorm and they are dancing happily. Rachel approaches Zero and takes his hand, and we dance. But I can see that Zero glares at Jenna, who is dancing with Thomas. After dancing, we take a bottle of wine and we cheer and drink,but in silence( If manager knew it, we would be expelled from university). We drink a bit and then, Rachel speaks loudly: "HEY GUYS. WE ARE VERY HAPPY TONIGHT, SO I THINK WE SHOULD PLAY SOME GAMES. WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?".

Jane takes up an idea: " Hey, let's play "Truth or Dare" by spinning the empty bottle. It will be very funny and a bit dirty". She finishes her sentence by a wink to Zero. We sit around and take the bottle. Before spinning, Jane says : " Let's start with rules. First, one of us will spin the bottle and then...we will choose 2 people sitting the opposite direction where the bottle points at. If you choose truth, you have to answer the question, no matter how sensitive it is. If you choose dare, you have some choices:making out, drinking wine, stripping or dancing. It will be steamy now", she whispers in my ear. I feel goosebumps because I never...kiss anyone before. It's very embarrassing, but it is true. I never wanted to open my heart before. My past didn't allow me to do it. I used to believe in my uncle and the black suit man, but I was betrayed. Even my dad left me. I couldn't find Gideon and Laura to say " Thank you". I owe them my whole life. I only want to meet them, just only once,but it is hopeless. I never thought that any girls could love me because of my traumas in the past and philophobia. My thoughts are interrupted when Thomas touches my shoulder. I startle and look at others' faces. I feel like I'm alien. I smile to reconcile and calm down myself and we start playing. Jane does first, and it points at... Jenna. She blushes and she take a glass of wine and takes a sip. However, up to the second round, Jenna leaves to her room because her roommate are sick. She is a caring one, so it's understandable.

After 3 times spinning, it finally points at me. I look toward and see that I'm opposite with Zero. OH MY GOD! Rachel asks me then : Jude, what will you choose? Truth or dare?"

"Truth, I guess", I respond.

"OK. So, have you ever kissed anyone before?"

" Yeah...I kissed my uncle...my aunt...and.... Laura, my maid"

"No, it doesn't count, Jude. I want to ask if you had ever kissed any girls before. Don't say to me that you never kissed! You are still a virgin guy, Jude?"

"No. I had a girlfriend in...high school, and...I kissed her multiple times", I blurt out to avoid the embarrassment. How can she ask me this question? It's too private. I'm about to stand up when Zero mocks me "Children are not allowed to join in this game. Gentlemen have to take responsibility for his action and fair playing". I feel a bit frustrated and angry, and I decide to stay. It's my turn to spin. The bottle points at Zero, and he chooses to strip his clothes. Jane and Rachel looks at his abs and widen their eyes.They look as if they want to eat him right now.Thomas spins and it does at Jane. Jane stands up and dances wildly. She is likely to flirt Zero by twitching her butt .She giggles and takes a big sip. Zero is the next one, and then I'm chosen. I choose "dare" to show to the cocky Zero that I'm mature enough. But Jane asks me to make out with...Zero. What the fuck? I'm not gay. I hate Jane now. She's really anal.

I choose to take off my clothes. Zero looks up and scrutinizes my bare torso. I work out sometimes, so my chest is quite broad. I feel pressure and tensity in Zero's glare. His eyes show his...lust! What am I thinking? I sometimes don't understand myself. I sit down and smirk to Zero, though I can feel heat in my cheeks. I take a sip of wine and continue playing. It turns to Thomas, and he chooses dare. He takes a sip of wine and gives it to Jane's tongue, but doesn't finish. She kisses Rachel and they laugh like idiots.How dirty it is! I don't know but blushing crawls into my cheeks. I bet my face is red as beetroot right now. Thomas is sleepy, so he comes back to his room. It's only 4 people: me, Jane,Rachel and Zero. The last round is Zero and he choose dare. He takes off his pants and throws it to Rachel. She stands up and dances with Zero. I stand up and Jane taps my butt. I turn around and I frown at her.

It's 11 p.m. right now,so we separate. I go to my room and go to my own bed. Zero walks into the room and he is shirtless. I don't know why, but I look at his muscular chest, his arm and his abs in whole minutes. I only take my senses when he flicks his fingers and call out my name : "Hey Jude. What are you looking so deeply?"

" Zero. I'm sorry...hmm...well...I sleep now. Good night!"

I sleep to conceal my blushing face because I don't want him to tease me. I only hope that he is not too talkative to reveal it to Jane. She is a nosy and annoying girl.I suddenly think about Rachel's question. I know that it's only my excuse, but I have obvious reason. I can't sleep well until my cruel and manipulative uncle still lives in wealth and happiness. He always acts like he is innocent and he cares to me, that "your dad is dead but I still here. I will never abandon you". _Yes, you don't abandon me, you will kill me by your own hands._

My past made me cold-hearted and afraid of love. I always close my heart, and I never had any relationship. I want to find someone inspirational and motivating to share. But it's too hard to do because nobody understands me. I smile in front of their faces, but they don't know that my inside is broken in pieces. I used to be jealous of classmates who have both father and mother.I used to bullied and mocked by some boys in the school when they found out that I'm an orphan. I never thought that people can be heartless and apathy to others. They judge a book by its cover and they criticize it without reading the contents. My thoughts are interrupted when I hear someone sobbing and groaning. I get out of my bed and I realize that it is from Zero. I come near to him and I feel heat surrounding him. Shit! He is fever now. I go to the bathroom and take a clean towel and a bucket of water. I touch on his forehead and it's hot. I cover the towel on his forehead and repeat about 20 times, and his temperature is normal. I go to my first aid box and take a pill. It will help him decrease the temperature and feel better. I open his mouth by two fingers and give the pill to his mouth. I elevate his head and let him drink water. He gulps and leans on the bedside. I tidy all the stuffs and go to the bathroom.I come back quickly in case he needs something. I sit on the edge of the bed and look at his face. His face is calmer and softer when he sleeps. I massage his temporal bones to help him sleep more deeply. I see him putting his head into my hands. I think he is comfortable so I continue doing it.However, he turn back and forth; it seems that I make him uncomfortable. I'm about to leave when he speaks up in raspy voice:

" Jude, massage for me please. You are very genius and your hands are magical".

I smile slightly and massage for him. I see him sleep well and I return my bed after kissing his forehead. I go to my bed when I realize: I just kiss Zero. Holy shit! What happened? Why i always lose my consciousness when I'm around him. I go to my bed and I hope that he has slept and doesn't know about it.

* * *

**I FOLLOW JAMES LA ROSA- HTF'S DIRECTOR AND I SEE THAT HE POSTED SOME SCRIPTS AND I'M FEELING SO ANXIOUS. I HOPE THAT HTF WILL RETURN SOON. LOVE YOU ALL!🥰😘😍🧡🧡**

_https://www.instagram.com/p/CJMDvkvgmfu/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link_


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